In the wee early days of CLSL I came on here and professed my mad crush on NBC’s Friday Night Lights. This time around, be prepared for a full on slobbery make-out session. Because the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences finally got their heads out of their self-absorbed and politically misguided asses and gave it some due.

Adopt me, please!

Coach and Mrs. Coach got Emmy noms today. That made today a good, good day in Dillon country.

For the record, I watch a LOT of TV. People ask me what shows I watch and I have to go by day of the week. And I still lose track. I like to use the fact I’m in the entertainment industry as an excuse, but really, I just love TV and I’m not ashamed. I love coming home with nothing to do, getting into jammies and snuggle up on the couch with a cocktail or glass of wine and the DVR busting at the seems. Although I love a lot of shows (Mad Men, Modern Family, Entourage to name a few…), I will only take a bullet for one show. Friday Night Lights.

I started watching this show after I first moved to Los Angeles at the urging of two of my guy friends. Once I started, I couldn’t stop. Pre-football season that year, catching up on past seasons of FNL was my home away from home. This show IS Texas. It looks like it, it sounds like it…it even tastes like it. It had me wishing to tattoo TEXAS FOREVER on my rear end.

It specifically embodies high school football in Texas. It is a religion. When you’re in high school, on a Friday night in the fall, whether 100 degrees or snowing, you’re suiting up on the field, on the sidelines with pom poms, in the stands with a trumpet or wearing a drill team uniform, or your just there to watch. Regardless of why you’re there…you’re there. There is a joke in some towns that property values go up the closer you are to the high school football field.

But you don’t have to be a football fan of any shape or size to get this show. That is just how it’s Texasness sucked me in to begin with. Above all else, this show is…it’s REAL. I triple dog dare you to get where we’re currently at in the series without thinking that Connie Britton (Mrs. Coach) and Kyle Chandler (Coach) aren’t a real couple. In my brain, there is a cozy house in the middle of West Texas with “Welcome to the Taylors” written on the doorstep, home of a high school principal and a high school football coach. You can visibly SEE the chemistry between these two…and it’s gorgeous.

I dare the ladies not to the fall in love with Riggins, the guys not to fall for Lyla. I dare everyone not to get caught up in Julie and Matt’s aura of first love. Right now I dare everyone not to want to go out and buy a Dillon East Vince Howard jersey. I dare you not to sit down and have an anxiety attack before each show.

Most of all, I dare you not to find that its addictiveness and AWESOMENESS are palpable. I dare you not to believe clear eyes and full hearts can’t lose.

P.S. another good post about the nod, from one of my Twitter followers, here.

Readers, I really hate Mondays. The only things I hate worse than Mondays are the Eagles, Scott Gomez, the 101 and water chestnuts. What makes this Monday particularly atrocious: we open a movie on Friday so there’s potential for mutiny in the office, I HAVE to go grocery shopping after work and no one likes that (if you do, you’re a weirdo), I couldn’t care less about tonight’s MNF, I’m fighting off the bitterness of losing my first fantasy football game (by less than five points; McGahee – you’re on my shit list, son) and it’s so gloomy outside I should be at home under two blankets, snuggled with the pooches, watching Battlestar Gallactica, drinking hot chocolate topped with a scoach of Bailey’s. Mmm.

In a painful effort to be positive (blurgh) I do have to say that today is somewhat bearable because I managed to put makeup on before noon, am loving my new scarf from Old Navy, have a cold, cold Diet Coke on my desk (the elixir or life), the newness and lickability of the Taylor Lautner Rolling Stone photo shoot hasn’t worn off (my heart dies every time they put a football in that kid’s hands) and the interwebs are totes overloaded with Miles Austin.

Record breaking run

I feel like I’ve spent the last year and a half on the campaign trail for this young, blue-eyed wideout from Jersey (yeah, I try to forget that tidbit) to become the next President of the Dallas Cowboys Receiving Core. I don’t think ANYONE was ever listening to me or taking me seriously. Can’t really say I blame you, but it’s whatever now…cause eff you. Nikki FTW.

As an uber fan, it’s imperative to stick to your man through thick and thin. However, (here’s the segue from one version of today’s topic to the next…wait for it…) at what point does a TEAM stop sticking with a player through thick and thin? Tis a tricky predicament, that one. I hear this is a business, after all.

Last week I caught most of ESPN’S “30 on 30″ about Edmonton trading Gretzky to LA. Holy pucks the uproar that caused…the GM’s family even had to leave town. Koo koo Canadians. Not that I can blame them, that would be like America gifting the Statue of Liberty to Canada. We’d have to do more than just call shenanigans. Anyhow, in addition, several weeks ago PTI covered Phillies’ pitcher Brad Lidge’s horrific slump towards the end of the MLB regular season. Kornheiser commented that during the playoffs “you cannot put a guy out there you don’t have confidence in.” True story…perhaps?

How the Oilers and Phillies handled each of these situations was dependent upon what was best for the organizations, not what the fans wanted. In the end, Gretzky is now responsible for the explosion of hockey in Los Angeles, if not the entire Western United States and Lidge led the defending champs to a 6-5 victory over the Rockies last night to take a 2-1 lead in the NLDS. A personal example: I was destroyed when the Stars left Petr unprotected during the 1999 expansion draft and Atlanta took him. DESTROYED. But although his pro career didn’t last long afterward, he spent the majority of it in the NHL, made the All Star Team as a rookie and won a world championship. Chances are none of that would’ve happened if he’d stayed with the Stars. And I got to go to Atlanta and Calgary! Good times. Sometimes you just gotta let it play out.

Open issues

Having said that, there are some major issues on the table in Dallas. Do the Cowboys stand by Romo? Do the Stars stick with Turco? Both are huge fan favorites, but these aren’t questions that just popped up last week. These are 2-3 year-old problems. Neither of these guys have proved their worth in the playoffs. And right now neither of them are proving consistency in the regular season. I know it’s early, but again, these are long term open wounds. Not one of my mystery bruises that randomly pop up after I’ve been drinking. I don’t even know how *I* feel about what should be done. Although you’ll never see me wearing his jersey, I like Romo, he seems like a good dude. But damn. And Turco is even tougher. I have personal ties to him that make it heart-wrenching, so I kinda avoid talking about him. I really can’t imagine Marty on another team.

But at the end of the day, I’m honest enough to admit that my loyalty is to the teams over any individual player and selfish enough to say I want to see the Stanley Cup and Lombardi Trophy back in Dallas. No team should sell their souls for or buy a championship (*cough* Yankees) but changes, albeit temporarily hurtful to the fans, sometimes have to be made.

I am supposed to be on my way to Disneyland right now, but am fully aware of the hits my blog will be taking over the next 24 hours. Miles Austin and my longtime fixation with him have always driven a good 75%-80% of CLSL traffic. I HAPPILY welcome all my newbies and hope you come back for more…and more. Me taking a few seconds to post a quick update was a MUST. Cause Readers, I’ve known for awhile this day was coming and have been waiting somewhat patiently (sometimes annoyingly so…) for it to get here. Today’s game isn’t really a win the Cowboys or fans, as a whole, can be proud of. However, Miles Austin certainly can. He saved our asses. And there will be mutiny in Dallas if he’s not the starter now.

It’s funny, I’ve had my jersey for almost a year and now they’re going to be popping up all over Dallas like blondes with fake boobs. But it’s safe to say no fan in all of Texas received as many texts, tweets, Facebook comments and messages after today’s game as I did. I feel like I won the thing myself, CRACKS ME UP. And to be honest, I’d be drowning in fantasy right now (I’m undefeated thus far this season) if it wasn’t for the 39.4 points he got me.

However, having said all of this, if he fumbles four times and trips over his own feet in two weeks I will still be a fan. I don’t do bandwagon.

Cheers. Now I gotta go get my Mickey on.

[EDIT] Disneyland was a clusterf*ck. Skipped it, had dinner and drinks and cried through Bright Star. Came home, watching the Stars game (damn the OTs today!!!) and have replayed this six times…

Also: Post-game interview from DallasCowboys.com

Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome back

Readers, I wish you all a very happy and healthy NFL Kickoff Day and 2009 Season! This is going to be a very intriguing season for many teams (mine most certainly included) and I am totally stoked. If we learned anything from last season, no one can predict how this will end. Despite the fact it feels like just last weekend I was frosting yellow and red cupcakes for the Super Bowl, this off season has felt painfully and tragically long for Cowboys fans. After our QB getting his head stuck in his ass again, the locker room imploding, the entire team losing their damn minds in Philly, missing the playoffs all together and all the other utter bullshit, we’ve been awarded with a peaceful, sedated training camp and pre-season. Calm before the storm, perhaps? I know I’ve got my umbrella ready.

I have no probs admitting that many Cowboys fans tend to epitomize all that is wrong with Americans. I like to call it egotistical ignorance. Unfortunately, the arrogance is inherent since the majority of us were  born and raised in the country known as Texas. Thus bred with the grid iron as religion, blue and silver blood and a holier than thou attitude towards all things football. I have my moments, trust me. But I also know that 1996 was a LONG time ago and the last two years have been absolute disasters. We have an unproven receiving core and our head coach is a pussy. We will only go as far as our QB will take us, should he choose to finally step up and grow some balls. Howev, FEW teams (if any) can compare to our RB lineup. And we have what are arguably the best tight end and defenseman in the league. But individual stars does not a winning team make. My fingers are crossed, but I’m not holding my breath. I’ve had many a palm to forehead moments whilst seeing fan predictions of anything above 10-6. I’m not being pessimistic or a negative netty…just trying to be, I don’t know, realistic? Lord knows I hope they prove me wrong. But I seriously have higher expectations for my fantasy team. (I’m talking to YOU, Maurice Jones-Drew).

No matter how this season (or the next) may end, I will always take pride in being a born Cowboys fan. My future children, should they ever exist, will be able to choose their religions, politics and professions, but god forbid any one of them come home in a Giants jersey. I will ESPLODE.

One thing I’ve been adamant about regarding this blog is that it’s not your typical “come here for up-to-the-minute information and I’m just writing to hear myself talk expert analysis” site. There are plenty of those. Although half the time I DO know what I’m talking about, it’s more a bar hop through the crazy land of being a sports fan-ette. We’re out there, you  just have to dig to find the good ones. It’s like picking out good avocados. The mushy ones are useless and the unripened ones require too much patience.

I had some sports related encounters of the third and fourth kind this weekend. I made the comment a few weeks ago (don’t remember to whom, for all I remember it could’ve been to myself) that I feel like football season is going to be rather interesting. Not only in general and for the Boys, but for me, personally. For serious, had I known shit was actually going to happen I would’ve put something bigger out into the universe. Like, “I feel like Chris Evans is going to come knocking at my door…and my apartment will actually be clean at the time.”

A couple of weeks ago the LA Cowboys group I’m a part of posted a Facebook page. The first couple of days it was live I perused member profiles to seek out anyone I knew from last season. I clicked on this one dude, didn’t remember him from last year at first. When I jumped over to his profile, I  noticed he was friends with someone I sorta kinda knew back in Texas. Strange, but you’ve got my attention. So he pops in this past Friday night while we were all at Yankee Doodle’s for the last pre-season game and I bring it up. He says he went to high school with that one guy. Trust me, this isn’t a good thing, what could make it worse is if graduated in 2000.

Oh but he did.

Somewhat longer story short, this guy in MY Cowboys group (mine, all mine) played baseball and graduated with The Dreaded Ex. AND I actually knew him, as well, but didn’t remember him at first. I move 1,200 miles away from home to a city with over 4 million people and I run into someone like that. I call major shenanigans. It’s like my past is chasing me wielding a leather whip (and not in a good way).

U-C-ELLLLLLE-A

What makes it EVEN funnier (trust me, I’m not really laughing) is this past Saturday, as I’m heading to the UCLA game the person I’m meeting emails me and says there’s a guy in the group tailgating next to us who is a ginormous Cowboys fan and can’t wait to meet me. Excellent I say, just picked up my requisite bottle of Malibu (shouldn’t they be sponsoring this blog by now?) and am a few minutes away. I get to the Rose Bowl, have a few drinks, have some amazing grilled scrimp and over comes the Cowboys fan. Fingers crossed he’s cute, single and employed! And straight!

Swear to god, it’s another guy from the group.

Once we got the OH HOW FUNNY IS THIS outta the way and he went back to his peeps, I looked at my friend and was like okay that’s enough, where are the cameras? I don’t like being on this show anymore. Cause who was next? The guy from the high school hockey team (that I started) who I was redonkulously in love with for years, but I wasn’t good enough for, so he ruined my self-image for a good 10 years? No thanks, man. So then I started in on how true Cowboys fans must have internal magnets and we always attract one another no matter where we go. Trust me, it was a rather intriguing and well thought out theory at the time. Much like Carl’s Jr. chili cheese fries are at 3 a.m. under the same amount of influence.

Speaking of drinks, another virtual round to the Ladies… for the most excellent shout out.

One of my other favorite lady-ran sports blogs is Ladies… They’re on my blogroll (well, will be on it when it have it up and running again) and I follow them on Twitter. Today they had a post regarding pro athletes use of Twitter and the recent social networking crackdown from the NFL. They asked what we think, I almost commented…but realized that my comment was turning into an entire ramble that was more fitting for, well, here.

I’m absolutely fascinated by the tweets of all these football players. Martellus Bennett is on the Cowboys so I love him, but he is batshit crazy. But as long as he catches the ball, fool can be all sorts of crazy. TO’s bible verses were, what’s the right word, uncomfortable? Completely random? I’ll just go with odd. Pics of his recent mani/pedi were kinda like a train wreck, you just had to keep looking (much like the entire TO Show). Chris Cooley is a douche, but he’s on my fantasy team so I have to grin and bear it. OchoCinco…is self explanatory. But like the Ladies pointed out, it’s the little things I find interesting: what a player thought about a movie he just watched…or what song(s) he’s listening to get pumped up for a game. That part is no different than me saying “ugh, stuck in bloody traffic on the 101 AGAIN, but hey I’ve got Bob Schneider to keep me company” They’re multimillion dollar pro athletes, but they’re also varying forms of normal, just like us.

[Let's pause whilst I think about what it would be like to really have Bob to keep me company...]

I can look at this whole sitch as two different versions of me. The Nikki from over 10 years ago and the Nikki of today. Nikki from today is (on paper) mature, grown up, only internet stalks guys she’s actually involved with on some level (or was), is a huge football and hockey fan still, but is all about being a fan instead of going googly for a player. OKAY, aside from that whole Miles Austin thing, which is why I hope blue eyes NEVER gets a damn Twitter. But for the big pros who do have Twitters, Facebooks or official pages, I think it’s absolutely wonderful and in the age of the deteriorating player image, it’s the best thing that could’ve happen. Especially for poor hockey.

If the Twitter bird can make the playoffs in goal, the Stars should sign him

However, high school/college Nikki was bananas for hockey players. More on that can be found here, here and here. I think about what it would’ve been like if Twitter and Facebook existed THEN and my brain partially strokes out. (My college roommate is totes going to have a major *facepalm* moment when she reads that). I would have been absolutely uncontrollable. I already knew enough, I already made a big enough fool out of myself and I already put myself in plenty of a precarious situations. I’m not even talking about the biggies like Mike Modano and Jamie Langenbrunner. I’m talking about the pups, the rookies, the ones who were already way too accessible to me. Sweet Jesus I loved those boys. Petr could’ve been like “boozer25: going to play game now” and I woulda been all “nikkihearts25: @boozer25 OMG I LOVE YOU AND WILL HAVE 10,000 OF YOUR BABIES.” Now given, I’m overestimating Petr’s use of the English language at the time and underestimating what ability I did actually have to control myself and the words that came out of my mouth. But you get my point.

I was a good girl little girl with stars in my eyes (no pun intended) though, despite what it sounds like, and although I was a basket case over at least two players over the years, I handled myself well most of the time. But for every one of me? There were a dozen crazyspices out there who didn’t quite have my boundaries. I knew a few and although I turned in my Official Player Stalking Club card years ago, I’m assuming they still exist in minor league arenas all throughout the country. THAT is why Twitter worries me. For all these little manchildren playing in the minors out there, oy vey for them.

Can’t lie, now my brain is working on would’ve been tweets for some of the other guys. At least the ones it wouldn’t have completely dumbfounded. *cough*Jon*cough*

Update: the blogroll is back. I know you were worried.

Fantasy draft in 14 hours! My shit’s all in order just in case I’m only half coherent in the morning. I’m nervous though…I told someone today it’s like the first day of school, you just want to get there, get it over with and find out who is your damn class. You’re all please don’t let me be stuck next to guy who smells like baked beans all year. You know what I mean, Vern? Anyhow, I’m not sure which I want more: to win my league (finally) or to beat my friend Ray.  I’m gonna be greed city and go with both.

Obviously I visit loads of sports sites on a daily (hourly?) basis. I only comment on a few sites/forums just because I’m too lazy to get into it with people. I rarely have patience for morons, which is odd because I comment at KSK the most.  I find that talking about sports, especially football, ranks up there with religion and politics. The only difference for me personally is I can keep my mouth shut when it comes to the last two. However, that doesn’t mean I don’t try to keep up on current affairs and am open-minded about other choices and opinions that differ from my own. And I believe, if you fancy yourself a true fan or connoisseur of a sport, you should attempt to do the same.

I won’t go into specifics, but the other day someone on a Cowboys “forum” I frequent posted an update about Brett Favre’s inability to gel in the Vikings locker room. I read it, thought it was interesting (but didn’t really find it surprising, nor should anyone). Someone responded along the lines of he didn’t care about Favre or the Vikings, he only cared about the Cowboys. My first response was “crimeny, what a typical American ass-hole.” A bit of an unfair statement? Perhaps. A little true? Seriously. That’s a minor example of why Cowboys fans have such a bad rep.

I’m not saying you should be interested in every single team in the league and know every player’s dog’s name. Just saying you should probably look around. Playing fantasy you obviously HAVE to. However, being up-to-speed on what’s going on in the league, your conference and DEFINITELY your division doesn’t hurt. You don’t who you could face in the playoffs, the conference championship or the Super Bowl. No matter how asinine it is, the Vikings are picked to get far this year, if not all the way (lame), by a lot of talking heads; they’re in the NFC and we play them the last pre-season game. So in a lot of ways, it does have to do with the Cowboys. Maybe I’m just being a nerd, I don’t know. OR maybe I don’t like sounding like a retard.

I have to admit though, as open-minded as I am about religions and politics, some things I won’t budge on…like my opinion (the FACT!) that all Eagles fans are dicks.

I caused a stir with something I said in my last post and even though I don’t have to clarify, I will for the hell of it. I’m sweet that way. The whole analogy of “my taste in teams is much like my taste in guys…” is NOTHING AGAINST the guys I’ve been in any sort of relationship with. People are who they are. And after all, there were reasons I liked them all in the first place and reasons I can’t get over a few. Aside from my lunacy. Teams and boys can break my heart over and over again and I ridiculously come back for more. Eventually one of my teams will be amazing enough to win me another championship and some guy will be awesome enough to never let me down. So that comment was totally me being hard on myself  and my patterns because, trust me, that’s what I do best.

Moving on…back in December I discovered how entertaining the search terms that lead people to this blog are in Turn me inside out and learn me. Since I took a stupidly long hiatus, I have some catching up to do. Oh, but it’s been worth the wait…

1. The Top 5 search terms: Jamie Langenbrunner, hockey room, Miles Austin, trying to find my way back home and Petr Buzek.

Jamie Langenbrunner I get. Hockey room I kinda get. Miles Austin is the obvious all time search term leader at CLSL. This will come as a surprise to absolutely no one. Not even a noob. “Miles Austin girlfried” is actually in the top 20. Ladies, I have no idea if he has a girlfriend and I don’t care as long as he keeps catching the ball and doesn’t change his eye color. “Trying to find my way back home” are idiots looking for song lyrics, why they click on a sports blog I have no idea. But the one that leaves me absolutely dumbfounded is Petr Buzek. If you’re Googling Petr Buzek, dude, introduce yourself. I refuse to believe anyone outside of Kalamazoo and myself remember and give a crap who he is. Unless…he’s Googling himself. In that case, well, that’s another discussion all together.

PB

Funny enough, I just did a Google image search for Petr and two pictures of me came up. Huh. He just thought he could get away from me by moving back to the Czech Republic and retiring!

(edit: also whilst searching for a picture to use in this post, I came across a video interview with him from last year. This is the first thing I’ve seen with him for over six years. If I miss 14 typos before I post this…you now know why, as the 18 y ear-old in me died a little and I am ruined).

2. Burbank sports bar, The Office Bar and Grill, sports bars in LA, etc.

Several searches for sports bars lead people here. In case you pop upon this post first, I reviewed several Los Angeles area sports bars here in She don’t mean nothing – she’s just having fun. I’m kinda slacking in this department. But have no fear, football season starts in less than two months. So my alocholism and hot wing addictions are sure to kick back in.

3. ” hot girl cowboys game”

I don’t even know where to begin. First of all, this doesn’t make sense grammatically. Second of all, this just doesn’t make COMMON SENSE. Hey that hot girl who sat down the row from me at the Bengals game, or that hot girl I saw on TV during the Ravens game…I bet I can Google her!

No. You can’t.

4. “jamie langenbrunner nude”

This came up (no pun intended) in the first search term post as well and it doesn’t seem to be stopping. Which, ew. For the record I never mention Langenbrunner nude EVER.

5. “sport bars in los angeles for cowboy fan”

Yankee Doodles on Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica. Every game. We are the cat’s pyjamas.

6. “how to dress like Tim Riggins”

Oh, Timmy Riggins

This is probably my favorite search term EVER. Absolutely fabulous. I even tweeted about it. Here’s my question, do you actually watch Friday Night Lights? (If you don’t, YOU SHOULD) Because if you do, you’d know to just crawl out of bed looking all morning after tussled and hot, throw on week old jeans and a flannel shirt half buttoned and you’re good to go. Instant chick manget, that 33.

And brace yourself for not so lucky number seven…

7. “gay men hockey players s**king d**k in locker room”

Um…

Yeah.

Random P.S. Speaking of relationship nonsense, I’ve been asked to guest blog over at Excuse My Nonsense. This site is owned and operated by one of my best friends and examines the lives and insanity of single ladies knocking on the door 0f 30. It’s like a younger Sex and the City, but takes place in New York, Dallas and Los Angeles, with too many pet dogs, no designer shoes and not enough sleeping around. My first post can be found here, When I grow up.

I blame a lot on Patron right now. I’m on a strict no Patron policy for the foreseeable future until I can trust myself again. Regardless, I’m back. Possibly because I’m tired of people asking me why I’m not writing anymore. Possibly because I know I have to do something other than read the Twilight books, eat Chinese food, bake cupcakes, hang out with gay guys and Feng Shui my apartment. See what happens to me when I’m going through football and hockey withdrawals AND dealing with a broken heart? Ridiculousness ensues. Having said that, I’m still cranky. So I’d like to complain about all the things I find wrong with sports during the summer months (including the two months we just lived through):

1. The Lakers. Ugh. Their fans ANNOY ME. Most of all, and I’ve mentioned this before, the traffic they cause during playoffs is the bane of my existence in Los Angeles for however many weeks it takes them to end their season…I pray to God for early elimination. Oh but that’s right, they’re not the Mavericks.  Anyway, I know LA traffic sucks balls every other day of the year. But game day traffic makes my commute home even more unbearable than it already is. Because all these rich ass h0les who live up in the valley are the epitome of fair weather fans and only go to games when 90% of ticket prices are in the triple digits. Between the income loss of the writers’ strike and the cost of the Lakers parade and now the Michael Jackson Memorial…I think I saw the Mayor of Los Angeles selling cherries on a street corner. Every penny counts these days, I hear.

2. Stupid playoff songs. I mean, really? The birthday sex song is painfully lame enough as is, inserting a team name and additional mentally challenged verses into it isn’t going to make it better. Just saying.

3. The NHL playoffs. It never fails that whoever wins the Stanley Cup, I lose. I need to just give up thinking there will be a team in the playoffs that I can cheer for through all four rounds. My taste in teams is much like my taste in guys. They’re amazing during the regular season when it’s all fun, games, drinking and screwing around…but when it comes to playoffs and the time to get serious and committed? Forget about it. It’s just MUCH easier for them to watch it all go down from a distance or on the golf course. Apparently the Stanley Cup and I aren’t worth extra effort. But on a lighter note, we both love champagne!

Now having said that, what was a loss for me was actually quite a gain for the NHL (and a total wet dream come true for Gary Bettman). The Detroit Red Wings playing The Second Coming of Jesus (and oh yeah the rest of the Penguins) in a game 7 on a Friday night on network television. I’d love to know how many times Bettman had to dry an eye or change his pants.

4. OTAs. More like WTFs. It’s like weeks of hot and heavy foreplay knowing you’re not getting any real action for THREE MORE MONTHS. It’s excruciating. Cock teases, much? And what’s that you say? Roy Williams had a few good catches today? GREAT, he’s good at a little over the shirt action, but talk to me again when the clothes come off. Don’t even get me started on the Cowboys draft this year. The sexual analogies I can make with that aren’t very ladylike. And my parents might be reading this.

5. Baseball. I tried it. Turns out I just don’t care. And what’s the point of even trying to care before the all-star break? SERIOUSLY? I’ll go to a Dodger game any day of the week (or a Rangers game if I was home), drink too much beer and have a hot dog…but don’t make me watch on TV and for the love of all that’s holy, don’t make me log into my fantasy team. Cause I stopped doing that almost two months ago. Trying to figure out why no one has asked to trade for my good players yet, actually.

6. The Stars losing their collective minds…again. Since I looked at the Kings two seasons before this last one and thought to myself “hey, THERE is the type of coach I want on my team!”

Ah, I feel better now.

Parmesan cheesy...GET IT?

I am introducing a new category to CLSL Ludacrisly called  “On top of books”. Obviously, there are a plethora of sports related books out there, from fact to fiction, and from time to time I pick one up. I’m currently in the midst of reading “Boys Will Be Boys” as you know. However, towards the end of 2008 I picked up “Playing for Pizza” by John Grisham heading out of LAX. My grandfather died on Veteran’s Day, from the time I found out, to booking my flight, to getting on the plane was less than 24 hours. I was a bit of a wreck, as it was my first grandparent to pass away. So naturally, I frantically skizzed to the airport sans reading material. I hopped over to the used section at the bookstore in my terminal and came across this book, when really I was actually looking for a trashy romance novel (which I never read…however, one of my besties told me there’s a trashy romance novelist out there who pens books including football and hockey players…STAY TUNED, FOLKS).

Up until the Stars moved to Dallas and my whole world became hockey and I decided I was going to be a sports journalist, I actually wanted to be a lawyer. Therefore, there’s not many older Grisham novels I’ve not read or movies I’ve not seen. When I saw “Playing for Pizza” on the store shelf, I was like, well this doesn’t look lawyery…and turns out? IT WAS ABOUT THE FOOTBALL. Specifically about an American football league in Italy.

This is an excerpt from Publisher Weekly’s synopsis via Amazon:

Third-string Cleveland Browns quarterback Rick Dockery becomes the greatest goat ever by throwing three interceptions in the closing minutes of the AFC championship game. Fleeing vengeful fans, he finds refuge in the grungiest corner of professional football, the Italian National Football League as quarterback of the inept but full-of-heart Parma Panthers. What ensues is a winsome football fable, replete with team bonding and character-building as the underdog Panthers challenge the powerhouse Bergamo Lions for a shot at the Italian Superbowl.

And yes, Browns + AFC Championship gave me pause as well. Quickly followed by “ohhhh, right…FICTION.” However, let’s face it…Cowboys + NFC Championship = FICTION as well.

This book sounds cheesy (Parmesan cheesy…HA!) and TRUST ME, it is. But it’s like a grown up version of Little Giants with lots of wine and ridiculously delicious sounding Italian food. And my imagination casted Josh Duhamel as Rick, which was rather nice and quite acceptable.  And actually, turns out Phoenix Pictures has picked it up, so hey…Phoenix Pictures, you’re welcome for the suggestion. Anyhow, at the end of the week,  this quick little read was a refreshing escape from what I was going through. All the wine and tequila I consumed MIGHT have helped as well.